Does great art come from struggle?
Many of us, creatives, have spent our lives with our true selves stifled, undervalued by society and even by well-meaning individuals. To live a creative life isn’t a choice, it’s a way of thinking and seeing the world. We are doers, constantly thinking, perpetually following the never-ending journey of "what if" and middle-of-the-night inspiration.
Many creatives find their voice and space to create in middle age as the demands of society lesson, after having chosen more stable and traditional roles. Having lost themselves along the way, only to spend time later rediscovering who they were all along. It’s a real loss that these gifts are not recognized and rewarded earlier in life. So much lost time, so many breakthroughs and ideas left to later years. When a society ceases to value creativity, it ceases to grow and thrive.
Over these last two years, I struggled to express myself and began working abstractly. This new obsession arose from the space to explore internally during months spent bed-bound after a series of surgeries. Before 2020, I painted largely representational works. However, a repetitive elbow injury and an ankle injury forced me to seek another way to express myself. Frustrated with my circumstances, I sought refuge in art, creating worlds on paper from my bed.
It took hundreds of starts, stops, iterations, small improvements, failures, faith and fortitude to arrive where I am now. My representational work reflects an ideal of beauty, harmony, and joy. Yet, there is also a part of me, worn and tattered, fractured and forgotten. I pick up the pieces from years ago, arrange, cut, and reorder them into something beautiful.
Change is scary, but discarding beloved passages and things that no longer serve you, is necessary for growth. Out of hardship, meaning can be born. I will never stop exploring and searching the next painting. There is beauty in the struggle—in what lies underneath, what’s covered up, and what’s exposed. The things we live with shape our lives, and what we choose to keep, becomes who we are.